"He laid down His life for us. We should always lay down our lives for our brothers." -1 John 3:16
What does your spouse have to do to get your attention? How do you respond to their needs? Do you meet them all the time, or only when it is convenient? Are you really listening to what your spouse is saying?
Love makes sacrifices. Love moves and works even when it is not convenient. Love takes your spouses desires and needs and puts them ahead of your own. No excuses allowed.
The words, "How can I help you," should always be on the lips of someone who is married. You should use what God has given you to seek out ways to serve your spouse. Is he stressed from work and needs to be understood? Is she feeling overwhelmed by trying to run the house while trying to raise three children under the age of five?
A good marriage is usually surrounded and covered by both parties sacrificing for each other. A poor one is usually surrounded with selfish guarding of one's resources and trying to demand your own needs to be met.
I am amazed at how many times whenever I stop trying to meet my own needs and meet Patti's, that mine end up being met. That just seems to run counter-intuitive. You would think that you should try to meet your own first and then try to meet theirs. I remember watching a Christian movie called No Turning Back (if you have not seen it, then you must run, not walk, out and rent it today). There was a scene in the movie, when the main character had just lost her son to a tragic accident. She did not know why or how to move past the pain. So, she just kept right on doing what she had always done. She was a volunteer at a local hospital. There came in a man, who had just been paralyzed in an accident. He was hurting and trying to figure out how he was going to get by in life. This main character ministered to him because of her hurt. She used her pain to get this man through his pain. By being faithful to the call of serving, she was able to find the healing she needed.
That what we are called to do as Christians. Christ came, not as a conqueering king, but as a servant. He did not demand that we meet his needs, but he bound up our brokeness. He restored what WE had destroyed. He said, "I love you too much to leave your needs unmet." We need to mimick our Lord.
Today's dare is to seek out your spouse's greatest need and meet it. I had an easy time identifying the what, but finding the strength to do the how was a problem. Our middle child, Anna, turned five last week. We had planed to have her birthday party on Sat. This was going to be the first party that we had where we told the parents that they could just drop off their children and we would provide all the supervision. The problem, I have very little tolerance of young children (others), and I had just came down with a bad chest cold. I knew what Patti needed, but did not have the energy to do the task. So, I decided that I would be the man.
I stepped up and helped with the party. I helped lead the children in the games and provided the redirection when one of the other children stopped listening. I passed out the cake and ice cream. I cleaned up after everyone. I met her need. The funny thing is, that was the best I felt all day. I enjoyed the time and the look on my daughter's face. I need to serve my wife more and demand her to serve me less.
Lord, thank you for giving me the strength to serve Patti Saturday. Thank you for coming as a perfect role model for how to be a servant. Let me live that out in my life and help other people to see you in my service.
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